Showing posts with label Life's Like That. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life's Like That. Show all posts

29.8.11

The Art of Letting Go


Letting go, one of the most difficult things we all have to face at least once in our lifetime. For us girls, it's really devastating dilemma. We tend to be more emotional than men. The pain experienced by the man maybe magnified a couple of times for a woman.

How do you say goodbye to all the hopes you've put out for that dream? How do you start picking up the pieces? How can you manage to leave everything behind?

I had my share of mistakes and blunders and I can't really  tell if I will still make those in the future. There are lots of years ahead of me and in life nothing is for certain.

When we let go, we give up the possibility. We accept that somethings are never meant to be. No matter how much it hurts, we must swallow the pain that goes along with it. People who never learn to let go will never grow. It is comparable with that of a pupa. If it resists the process of metamorphosis. She will never become a butterfly. The same goes for life. Whether it is going through a family problem, losing a loved one or something important, or being betrayed by someone, we must let go in order for us to grow.


As for me, I'm letting go of my ideals. I'm freeing myself from the notions programmed into me when I was a kid. I'm leaving behind fairy tales. I'm cutting myself away from all the drama. I've done stupid almost unthinkable and even pitiful things in the past just to hang on. I didn't want to feel alone, unloved and useless . I did quite a number of things that a sane stable girl wouldn't do. I don't want to be caught in the cycle. I want to stop obsessing about the norms especially on me being a hopeless romantic. It never did me any good. It just resulted in me getting hurt and disappointed. I'm taking a stand and putting my heart in my sleeve with caution and a renewed faith. Living life the way we should live it by keeping everything real and untarnished by my own delusions and frustrations.

It is in moving on that you allow God to take control. When we let go, we realize our fallibility . It is a courageous act of accepting our destiny. Happiness starts when we let go. Everybody deserves to be happy. We all should learn to let go one way or the other. It's high time that you and I take that little leap of faith. For once, face the unknown and entrust ourselves to God. Letting go is never easy but life same goes for life. It will never be easy, for cowards and for those who continue to live under the sheath of falsity. Hiding under what we perceive as norms is not living life the way it is supposed to be.


We should stand up and walk out of our history.  Besides, letting go isn't the end of world but the beginning of a new life.

5.7.11

Dysfunction

There are times when I keep on thinking what's wrong with me?

Why do some people ignore me? Some people hurt me for no reason at all.

Then I realized that the dysfunction I have is being too self giving to the point that I allow others to hurt and exploit me.

I should be aware that no matter how kind a person I should not misinterpret.

I should never fall for someone who says things and yet fails to stand up to it. I should stop being kind to them in order to be kind to myself.

I choose to walk away from those guys that fail to appreciate, the problem isn't no longer in me.

I will no longer waste time for those who can't be a real friend or a real man.

I was keeping a single message for more than 3months and it was only til now that I realize that I was clinging to something that was never important.

I thank God for this insight. I've learned to have some self-love.

4.7.11

My Own Little Escape



When I was a kid, I can never sleep without hugging a pillow close to me. My mama can attest to the countless times when I would look for something to hug for me to be able to sleep. I never knew why I grew fond of it. As I turned 8 or was it 7, my mama gave me a small teddy bear and even til now I still have that teddy. From the day I received it til the time I got a new teddy bear, I never let go of it. I can never sleep without it.



It was only til now that I realized why I love having a teddy bear close to me when I'm asleep. It's because you feel cozy and warm without having to give something back in return. Teddy bears never reject you and they are always there for you when ever you need comforting. Up until now I still have a teddy with me in bed. It is the reason why I love being in my room. For it is when I am alone that I don't feel rejected. I don't have to worry about how people will think of me. I have peace when I see no one but my teddy bear. I don't have to try for someone to like me. I can just be me. The plain, crazy and invisible me. Sometimes things than happen in reality that are too much for one person to bear and sometimes the people you need the most are never there.
My little escape from the world is no big secret. I think we have the same secret.  Just me, my room and my teddy. Sometimes you have to escape to avoid losing yourself.

11.9.09

Blunt Truths About Guys



I'm just making my version of the book "He's Just Not That Into You". I hope this can help those girls who are all out when it comes to love despite the hurt. I just want girls to realize that loving doesn't mean losing their dignity and self-love.

Leave the guy if:

1.He doesn't show he cares. It is so plain and simple. No reasons needed. Stop thinking that he is just holding back. A guy who truly cares can't help but show it.


2. He is self-destructive. If he doesn't heed advices that are good for him, it's a no no. Yes, it is bad to demand a person to change but if he really loves you he would consider your point. A person who is stubborn will take a millennium to change. You'll just get frustrated, you wouldn't want to waste your time for a person who doesn't want to improve himself. Examples of these are : guys who keep on dropping out in school, guys who party all the time, guys who use drugs and guys who are nymphomaniacs. You'll only be pulled down. You deserve someone way better.
3. He doesn't have the initiative. By law of nature, it is the guys who does things for the girl and not the other way around. You don't want to be in a relationship wherein you are the slave. Your parents didn't raise you to be one. There should be equality. Please don't put his happiness before his. It should be at the same level.
4. He keeps on making excuses for things he forgot to do or for the promises he broke that is unless he has the same disease as what Drew Barrymore had in "50 First Dates". It just shows how irresponsible he is, you wouldn't want to marry someone like that. Just think of it. A man should practice what he preach and must keep his promises.
5. You keep worrying about him. A guy who doesn't tell about what he is up to ain't worth it at all. Imagine how it would be like when you guys get married. You will look 50 even-though you're only 30. A real man is considerate and thoughtful to the lady he loves.


These are the main truths that girls should accept. It is high time that we all wake up from our dreams and face reality. No matter how much you like that guy if he can't do the same for you it would still be a waste. A woman deserves to be respected and treated like a delicate glass. Stop letting those jerks who pretend to be real men trample on you and your dignity. You are way better than that. Don't be desperate. Just trust that God has already made the right one for you.

30.4.09

I AM MY OWN BOSS

LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE OF IT

The power to succeed or fail is yours alone.



You alone have the responsibility to shape your life.

Nothing and no one can deny you greatness once you understand this.


There's no one to stop you but yourself.



No one can cheat you out of ultimate success but you.



More powerful then all the success slogans ever written



is the realization that everyone has but one boss.

That boss is you.



Picture yourself vividly as winning,



and that alone will contribute immeasurably to success. 

I've read this off a site and now I realize how important it is to believe in yourself. How stepping out of your comfort zone can benefit. All my life I was never brave enough to do this that I wanted. I thought too much of others before myself. Somehow I always let others be the boss. It made me down and displeased. Though there were good things that happened along the bossing around but I always felt like there is something missing. On May, I will be doing things that will somehow liberate me from the routinely submissive me. For once, I will believe that I can win. No more doubting in my capacity. I can because I will it to be. I'll be taking on new challenges in my life and I won't shy away from it. I'll fight head on. I will do it or die trying. AJA!!!!! I will fight and it will be a good one. 

15.4.09

48 Laws of Power

The 48 Laws of Power

by Robert Greene and Joost Elffers

Law 1

Never Outshine the Master

Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite – inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power.

Law 2

Never put too Much Trust in Friends, Learn how to use Enemies

Be wary of friends-they will betray you more quickly, for they are easily aroused to envy. They also become spoiled and tyrannical. But hire a former enemy and he will be more loyal than a friend, because he has more to prove. In fact, you have more to fear from friends than from enemies. If you have no enemies, find a way to make them.

Law 3

Conceal your Intentions

Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. If they have no clue what you are up to, they cannot prepare a defense. Guide them far enough down the wrong path, envelope them in enough smoke, and by the time they realize your intentions, it will be too late.

Law 4

Always Say Less than Necessary

When you are trying to impress people with words, the more you say, the more common you appear, and the less in control. Even if you are saying something banal, it will seem original if you make it vague, open-ended, and sphinxlike. Powerful people impress and intimidate by saying less. The more you say, the more likely you are to say something foolish.

Law 5

So Much Depends on Reputation – Guard it with your Life

Reputation is the cornerstone of power. Through reputation alone you can intimidate and win; once you slip, however, you are vulnerable, and will be attacked on all sides. Make your reputation unassailable. Always be alert to potential attacks and thwart them before they happen. Meanwhile, learn to destroy your enemies by opening holes in their own reputations. Then stand aside and let public opinion hang them.

Law 6

Court Attention at all Cost

Everything is judged by its appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing. Never let yourself get lost in the crowd, then, or buried in oblivion. Stand out. Be conspicuous, at all cost. Make yourself a magnet of attention by appearing larger, more colorful, more mysterious, than the bland and timid masses.

Law 7

Get others to do the Work for you, but Always Take the Credit

Use the wisdom, knowledge, and legwork of other people to further your own cause. Not only will such assistance save you valuable time and energy, it will give you a godlike aura of efficiency and speed. In the end your helpers will be forgotten and you will be remembered. Never do yourself what others can do for you.

Law 8

Make other People come to you – use Bait if Necessary

When you force the other person to act, you are the one in control. It is always better to make your opponent come to you, abandoning his own plans in the process. Lure him with fabulous gains – then attack. You hold the cards.

Law 9

Win through your Actions, Never through Argument

Any momentary triumph you think gained through argument is really a Pyrrhic victory: The resentment and ill will you stir up is stronger and lasts longer than any momentary change of opinion. It is much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions, without saying a word. Demonstrate, do not explicate.

Law 10

Infection: Avoid the Unhappy and Unlucky

You can die from someone else’s misery – emotional states are as infectious as disease. You may feel you are helping the drowning man but you are only precipitating your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves; they will also draw it on you. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead.

Law 11

Learn to Keep People Dependent on You

To maintain your independence you must always be needed and wanted. The more you are relied on, the more freedom you have. Make people depend on you for their happiness and prosperity and you have nothing to fear. Never teach them enough so that they can do without you.

Law 12

Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim

One sincere and honest move will cover over dozens of dishonest ones. Open-hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people. Once your selective honesty opens a hole in their armor, you can deceive and manipulate them at will. A timely gift – a Trojan horse – will serve the same purpose.

Law 13

When Asking for Help, Appeal to People’s Self-Interest,

Never to their Mercy or Gratitude

If you need to turn to an ally for help, do not bother to remind him of your past assistance and good deeds. He will find a way to ignore you. Instead, uncover something in your request, or in your alliance with him, that will benefit him, and emphasize it out of all proportion. He will respond enthusiastically when he sees something to be gained for himself.

Law 14

Pose as a Friend, Work as a Spy

Knowing about your rival is critical. Use spies to gather valuable information that will keep you a step ahead. Better still: Play the spy yourself. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions. There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying.

Law 15

Crush your Enemy Totally



Law 16

Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor

Too much circulation makes the price go down: The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.

Law 17

Keep Others in Suspended Terror: Cultivate an Air of Unpredictability

Humans are creatures of habit with an insatiable need to see familiarity in other people’s actions. Your predictability gives them a sense of control. Turn the tables: Be deliberately unpredictable. Behavior that seems to have no consistency or purpose will keep them off-balance, and they will wear themselves out trying to explain your moves. Taken to an extreme, this strategy can intimidate and terrorize.

Law 18

Do Not Build Fortresses to Protect Yourself – Isolation is Dangerous

The world is dangerous and enemies are everywhere – everyone has to protect themselves. A fortress seems the safest. But isolation exposes you to more dangers than it protects you from – it cuts you off from valuable information, it makes you conspicuous and an easy target. Better to circulate among people find allies, mingle. You are shielded from your enemies by the crowd.

Law 19

Know Who You’re Dealing with – Do Not Offend the Wrong Person

There are many different kinds of people in the world, and you can never assume that everyone will react to your strategies in the same way. Deceive or outmaneuver some people and they will spend the rest of their lives seeking revenge. They are wolves in lambs’ clothing. Choose your victims and opponents carefully, then – never offend or deceive the wrong person.

Law 20

Do Not Commit to Anyone

It is the fool who always rushes to take sides. Do not commit to any side or cause but yourself. By maintaining your independence, you become the master of others – playing people against one another, making them pursue you.

Law 21

Play a Sucker to Catch a Sucker – Seem Dumber than your Mark

No one likes feeling stupider than the next persons. The trick, is to make your victims feel smart – and not just smart, but smarter than you are. Once convinced of this, they will never suspect that you may have ulterior motives.

Law 22

Use the Surrender Tactic: Transform Weakness into Power

When you are weaker, never fight for honor’s sake; choose surrender instead. Surrender gives you time to recover, time to torment and irritate your conqueror, time to wait for his power to wane. Do not give him the satisfaction of fighting and defeating you – surrender first. By turning the other check you infuriate and unsettle him. Make surrender a tool of power.

Law 23

Concentrate Your Forces

Conserve your forces and energies by keeping them concentrated at their strongest point. You gain more by finding a rich mine and mining it deeper, than by flitting from one shallow mine to another – intensity defeats ex tensity every time. When looking for sources of power to elevate you, find the one key patron, the fat cow who will give you milk for a long time to come.

Law 24

Play the Perfect Courtier

The perfect courtier thrives in a world where everything revolves around power and political dexterity. He has mastered the art of indirection; he flatters, yields to superiors, and asserts power over others in the mot oblique and graceful manner. Learn and apply the laws of courtier-ship and there will be no limit to how far you can rise in the court.

Law 25

Re-Create Yourself

Do not accept the roles that society foists on you. Re-create yourself by forging a new identity, one that commands attention and never bores the audience. Be the master of your own image rather than letting others define if for you. Incorporate dramatic devices into your public gestures and actions – your power will be enhanced and your character will seem larger than life.

Law 26

Keep Your Hands Clean

You must seem a paragon of civility and efficiency: Your hands are never soiled by mistakes and nasty deeds. Maintain such a spotless appearance by using others as scapegoats and cat’s-paws to disguise your involvement.

Law 27

Play on People’s Need to Believe to Create a Cultlike Following

People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something. Become the focal point of such desire by offering them a cause, a new faith to follow. Keep your words vague but full of promise; emphasize enthusiasm over rationality and clear thinking. Give your new disciples rituals to perform, ask them to make sacrifices on your behalf. In the absence of organized religion and grand causes, your new belief system will bring you untold power.

Law 28

Enter Action with Boldness

If you are unsure of a course of action, do not attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous: Better to enter with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through audacity are easily corrected with more audacity. Everyone admires the bold; no one honors the timid.

Law 29

Plan All the Way to the End

The ending is everything. Plan all the way to it, taking into account all the possible consequences, obstacles, and twists of fortune that might reverse your hard work and give the glory to others. By planning to the end you will not be overwhelmed by circumstances and you will know when to stop. Gently guide fortune and help determine the future by thinking far ahead.

Law 30

Make your Accomplishments Seem Effortless

Your actions must seem natural and executed with ease. All the toil and practice that go into them, and also all the clever tricks, must be concealed. When you act, act effortlessly, as if you could do much more. Avoid the temptation of revealing how hard you work – it only raises questions. Teach no one your tricks or they will be used against you.

Law 31

Control the Options: Get Others to Play with the Cards you Deal

The best deceptions are the ones that seem to give the other person a choice: Your victims feel they are in control, but are actually your puppets. Give people options that come out in your favor whichever one they choose. Force them to make choices between the lesser of two evils, both of which serve your purpose. Put them on the horns of a dilemma: They are gored wherever they turn.

Law 32

Play to People’s Fantasies

The truth is often avoided because it is ugly and unpleasant. Never appeal to truth and reality unless you are prepared for the anger that comes for disenchantment. Life is so harsh and distressing that people who can manufacture romance or conjure up fantasy are like oases in the desert: Everyone flocks to them. There is great power in tapping into the fantasies of the masses.

Law 33

Discover Each Man’s Thumbscrew

Everyone has a weakness, a gap in the castle wall. That weakness is usual y an insecurity, an uncontrollable emotion or need; it can also be a small secret pleasure. Either way, once found, it is a thumbscrew you can turn to your advantage.

Law 34

Be Royal in your Own Fashion: Act like a King to be treated like one

The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated; In the long run, appearing vulgar or common will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a crown.

Law 35

Master the Art of Timing

Never seem to be in a hurry – hurrying betrays a lack of control over yourself, and over time. Always seem patient, as if you know that everything will come to you eventually. Become a detective of the right moment; sniff out the spirit of the times, the trends that will carry you to power. Learn to stand back when the time is not yet ripe, and to strike fiercely when it has reached fruition.

Law 36

Disdain Things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best Revenge

By acknowledging a petty problem you give it existence and credibility. The more attention you pay an enemy, the stronger you make him; and a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It is sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but cannot have, show contempt for it. The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem.

Law 37

Create Compelling Spectacles

Striking imagery and grand symbolic gestures create the aura of power – everyone responds to them. Stage spectacles for those around you, then full of arresting visuals and radiant symbols that heighten your presence. Dazzled by appearances, no one will notice what you are really doing.

Law 38

Think as you like but Behave like others

If you make a show of going against the times, flaunting your unconventional ideas and unorthodox ways, people will think that you only want attention and that you look down upon them. They will find a way to punish you for making them feel inferior. It is far safer to blend in and nurture the common touch. Share your originality only with tolerant friends and those who are sure to appreciate your uniqueness.

Law 39

Stir up Waters to Catch Fish

Anger and emotion are strategically counterproductive. You must always stay calm and objective. But if you can make your enemies angry while staying calm yourself, you gain a decided advantage. Put your enemies off-balance: Find the chink in their vanity through which you can rattle them and you hold the strings.

Law 40

Despise the Free Lunch

What is offered for free is dangerous – it usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. What has worth is worth paying for. By paying your own way you stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. It is also often wise to pay the full price – there is no cutting corners with excellence. Be lavish with your money and keep it circulating, for generosity is a sign and a magnet for power.

Law 41

Avoid Stepping into a Great Man’s Shoes

What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you will have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Do not get lost in their shadow, or stuck in a past not of your own making: Establish your own name and identity by changing course. Slay the overbearing father, disparage his legacy, and gain power by shining in your own way.

Law 42

Strike the Shepherd and the Sheep will Scatter

Trouble can often be traced to a single strong individual – the stirrer, the arrogant underling, the poisoned of goodwill. If you allow such people room to operate, others will succumb to their influence. Do not wait for the troubles they cause to multiply, do not try to negotiate with them – they are irredeemable. Neutralize their influence by isolating or banishing them. Strike at the source of the trouble and the sheep will scatter.

Law 43

Work on the Hearts and Minds of Others

Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.

Law 44

Disarm and Infuriate with the Mirror Effect

The mirror reflects reality, but it is also the perfect tool for deception: When you mirror your enemies, doing exactly as they do, they cannot figure out your strategy. The Mirror Effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact. By holding up a mirror to their psyches, you seduce them with the illusion that you share their values; by holding up a mirror to their actions, you teach them a lesson. Few can resist the power of Mirror Effect.

Law 45

Preach the Need for Change, but Never Reform too much at Once

Everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but on the day-to-day level people are creatures of habit. Too much innovation is traumatic, and will lead to revolt. If you are new to a position of power, or an outsider trying to build a power base, make a show of respecting the old way of doing things. If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement on the past.

Law 46

Never appear too Perfect

Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It is smart to occasionally display defects, and admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.

Law 47

Do not go Past the Mark you Aimed for; In Victory, Learn when to Stop

The moment of victory is often the moment of greatest peril. In the heat of victory, arrogance and overconfidence can push you past the goal you had aimed for, and by going too far, you make more enemies than you defeat. Do not allow success to go to your head. There is no substitute for strategy and careful planning. Set a goal, and when you reach it, stop.

Law 48

Assume Formlessness

By taking a shape, by having a visible plan, you open yourself to attack. Instead of taking a form for your enemy to grasp, keep yourself adaptable and on the move. Accept the fact that nothing is certain and no law is fixed. The best way to protect yourself is to be as fluid and formless as water; never bet on stability or lasting order. Everything changes.

9.12.08

The World's Most Communicable Disease



There is a funny story in circulation about an optimistic farmer who wouldn't wait to greet each new day with a resounding, "Good morning, God!" He lived near a woman whose morning greeting was more like, "Good God... morning?" They were each a trial to the other. Where he saw opportunity, she saw problems. Where he was satisfied, she was discontented.

One bright morning he exclaimed, "Look at the beautiful sky! Did you see that glorious sunrise?"
"Yeah," she countered. "It'll probably get so hot the crops will scorch!"

During an afternoon shower, he commented, "Isn't this wonderful? Mother Nature is giving the corn a drink today!"

"And if it doesn't stop before too long," came the sour reply, "we'll wish we'd taken out
flood insurance on the crops!"

Convinced that he could instill some awe and wonder in her hardened attitude, he bought a remarkable dog. Not just any mutt, but the most expensive, highly-trained and gifted dog he could find. The animal was exquisite! It could perform remarkable and impossible feats which, the farmer thought, would surely amaze even his neighbor. So he invited her
to watch his dog perform.

"Fetch!" he commanded, as he tossed a stick out into a lake, where it bobbed up and down in the rippling water. The dog bounded after the stick, walked ON the water, and retrieved it.

"What do you think of that?" he asked, smiling.

"Hmmm," she frowned. "Can't swim, can he?"

Sometimes I think that negative thoughts are the world's most communicative diseases. More catching than any known virus, and just as deadly. But an attitude of awe and wonder can be just as contagious!

The only difference between a good day and the bad day is ATTITUDE.

Which will you be spreading today?

* THIS WAS TAKEN OUT OF A BOOK ON INSPIRATIONAL STORIES

1.12.08

An Open Letter (for those who are Single)

I was reading a book by Richard Gosse entitled How to Find a Lasting Relationship and I managed to come across these two open letters. It was funny so I thought that I should share this with you.


----------------------------
AN OPEN LETTER TO SINGLE MEN
----------------------------
I'm a single woman looking for the right man for a romantic relationship. It's discouraging sometimes. You can make things a lot easier for me by doing the following:


1. Don't stay at home--I'll never be able to meet you.
2. Make yourself available by going to places that I frequent.
3. Don't be afraid to approach me. You're doing me a favor by breaking the ice.
4. Give me the same privilege of initiating contact with you.
5. Don't expect me to hop into bed just because you feel turned
on. I may not feel like it. And don't think that I owe you my
body just because you took me out on a date or bought me a
drink.
6. When we first meet, don't tell me I'm the most beautiful
woman you've ever met or that you are madly in love with me.
I'm not dumb enough to swallow that.
7. Don't talk to me like I'm one of the guys in the locker room.
I'm not.
8. Control your drinking. Too much booze makes you very
unattractive to me.
9. Please be patient and wait for me. Don't marry someone wrong
for you before I have a chance to meet you.



Sincerely,
Ms. Right

------------------------------
AN OPEN LETTER TO SINGLE WOMEN
------------------------------
I am a single man looking for someone special for a loving relationship. It isn't easy. You can facilitate things for me by doing the following:


1. Don't stay at home--I'll never be able to meet you.
2. Make yourself available by going to places I frequent.
3. If you're open to meeting me, let me know. A smile, eye
contact, standing or sitting next to me are all ways of
tipping me off that you find me attractive.
4. Take the initiative. I may be too shy to say hello, but that
doesn't mean I don't want to meet you.
5. Don't expect me to be witty, charming, clever or profound in
the first four minutes we talk. Give me time to relax and
find something we have in common.
6. Don't judge me harshly because you've had bad experiences
with other men. I am a unique person and deserve to be
treated accordingly.
7. Don't be on the defensive if I approach you. I know some guys
are rotten,but I'm different.


8. Don't assume that I want to go to bed with you. I might want
to get to know you first.
9. Don't be a tease and pretend you want to sleep with me if you
don't.
10. Don't play hard to get. I only have so much nerve and
motivation. I may give up on you quickly unless you give me
some encouragement.
11. Please be patient and wait for me. What a tragedy it would be
if you married the wrong person before you got a chance to
meet me.


Sincerely,
Mr. Right

24.11.08

Poetry from my past

here's a free verse poem i made last Feb 28,2008..

Here I am...

A year older yet I don't feel like I've done a lot in my life.

What's ahead for me is still vague.

What lies beyond, I can't foretell.

My soul is wounded.

I don't know if I can go on.

Do i pretend to be happy?

when the one I love doesn't even give a damn about me.

I loved him with no conditions but he chose to be without me.

I would not know right now if he's miserable like me or happy to be free from me.

Am I that worthless for you not to spare even a second of your time?

You're cold and hurtful yet, to my agony your the only cure.

How do I go on?

When you have left me here with nothing at all.

9.11.08

Where Home Is...


It's been a while since my sister and I went to our hometown. Last October 27, we went to Ormoc City. The place where I have spent more than 16 years of my life. the last time I was there was i guess Jan 4 of this year. When we arrived there it was still pitch black. It was only 4a.m. if I'm not mistaken. The wind was cold and the city was quite as it was always when got off the ship. As I ventured onto the streets, I saw new buildings. Quite clearly, somethings have changed in the city physically.

As we got home after a short walk from the pier. I saw our house (my lola's house actually). I was ambivalent. I was happy that we were back in Ormoc and yet sad at the same time. It was unlike my previous homecomings. Neither my mother nor father were there to pick us up at the pier. Our house was filled with dust and cobwebs. It was all messed up from the robbery. A lot of things were stolen. For me, those stuff didn't matter that much. What I was missing was our home. I was only looking at a house and nothing more  than a structure built for people to be protected from nature but it was no longer home for me.

Nothingness in that house. I miss those good old times. A couple of years back coming to Ormoc was such a momentous day for me. It was like a sanctuary for me. A relief from the stresses in college. I was able to enjoy the simple things like sleep in the living room while my mother was preparing a meal or going out for a meal with the whole family. I was able to relive those days when I was still a kid. I'd play with my dogs or look at the stars and the trees while sitting in the balcony (which is still not done) during night. A lot of things have changed.

Every year that I went home, I began to saw changes. Those changes struck me the most recently. I no longer felt at home. I felt like I was a stranger in Ormoc City. Although I know that change in Ormoc is quite slow but for me it has been drastic  that is in relation with my life and my connection with the place. Quite frankly, if you were to ask me if I'd prefer a vacation in Ormoc or stay in Cebu, my answer would be I rather stay in Cebu. Going back to Ormoc is heart breaking really. The reason why I go there are gone already. My parents are not there. Most of my childhood friends have moved elsewhere. My pets are all gone. The house is a wreck. I've become a stranger in my own hometown. Nothings the same at it was before. It was not the same place that I used to love. The warmth of coming home is gone. The experience woke me up. I realized that in the coming years, more things will change. Maybe one day, I will no longer feel at home here in Cebu. Maybe those familiar things that I love will also be gone.

We are all travellers in this lifetime. There are places that have been a part of who we are now. What's important is that we keep a morsel of those journeys in our heart. So that even if we turn into unfamiliar faces in our own hometown, we'd still know how it felt like to be at home. For in all of our journeys, what's essential is the heart of the traveller because within that heart lies our home.

11.10.08

Sweet Sorrow

"Parting is such sweet sorrow" as said by Romeo in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. Last night, we had a send off party for Bel. It made me think of leaving and how it is bittersweet. Bitter because distance may cause two friends to become complete strangers and sweet for I know that leaving means something better for that person who is leaving. Leaving is not easy. You leave those who are dear to you. Then I recall on those who have left me and those I left. My older sister was for me the greatest loss in our family. She died when I was 8y.o. She was just 12. This has left me wounded yet after all those years that have gone by, I have completely healed. Parting is one rudimentary of life. People come and go everyday. We are left with no choice but to welcome these changes. For those who have left fare thee well... For the people whom I have left in my past, I'm sorry but my purpose was to make myself better. I hope and pray for courage and strength to accept whatever departures that I will be facing in my life. ©

31.7.08

Me as of Now

Me as of now? Who am I now? What have I become?When I think of who I am now, I think of what I've been through. For the past months I've been through a roller coaster ride my life. 


I've learned that no matter how you plan out your life to be, there are things you can't control. 


It reminded me that I was only human. 


As for the heartbreak, yes, I've lost him. He decided to leave me and go with another girl. He said it was because of distance but I know it was a poor excuse. I admittedly became sad because of what he did. I am only human and I really did love him. I was a shipwreck then, so devastated with what he had decided upon.


Thanks to my family, friends and of course God, I am slowly picking myself up and I've come to realize that I deserved somebody better. 


As I bid farewell to our memories, I open my door to the world of new opportunities, I am now seeing a lot of things. With the experience of a reality show audition, I've started to place high regard on myself. I know in the past years, I've always had negativism to what I could be. Always putting myself down. 


Self-pity was definitely my second nature back then. Now, I realize all the things that I really am, with that I am more strong and brave. I can say that I am ready for another batch of tests God has in store for me. 


For as long as I have those who love me, I'll never give up. I'll make the best out of my life.


 As for love, heartbreaks are there but I know one day, the real prince will reveal himself to me. I know that it won't be the ideal ending of "happy ever after" but I know when the right time comes I will be in love with a prince that will be with me throughout my lifetime.This is me as of now, alone but not lonely, wounded yet continues to fight, fallen but still optimistic and ready for new challenges in this lifetime.






19.3.08

The Art of Letting Go

Live every moment of your life.

People often times dwell on the negativism that have occurred in their life. They end up living in a small nook in the big room of life. When your life's drenched in sorrow and pain, you just need to look around you. The world won't stop for you to take up the broken pieces back. Time fades. Life is much beautiful if you fill yourself with positivity. Often than not, we misconstrue our lives. We fail to see that there are more things to be grateful about. I hate waking up early in the morning yet I love the morning. It is a reminder that I am still alive and that I still have the opportunity that others don't have anymore. If somebody broke your heart, don't go hating on him/her. Wasting time for a person who doesn't value you will only mean giving part of your precious life. When you're down and out, when you feel the whole world is going against you and when you feel there's no reason for living. You should just let go of it and continue living. You can have a good life if you will it to be. Give yourself a chance to be happy.

7.12.06

tOrN

Torn: a verb in past tense which means something is divided or cut into parts.As for me it means being caught in a dilemma.

How do you deal when you are torn between two important things? First, you love something or it could be someone, but it's a feeling something not certain. Next, your mind tells you to do the exact opposite.

In this case who should rule over?

The heart or the mind? I know most people would say it should be a balance between both. It is such a cliche. Maybe it is so hard to balance it especially when they are contraindications. I hate being in a dilemma and sad to say I have been stuck in this dilemma for almost four years. I have to admit I am a coward. Although I keep advising my friends to follow what they think is right but for me I only preach. I have chosen to live on the safe side. I have never ever taken a risk in my life. Quite sad I know,but then again,WHY SHOULD I TAKE THE RISK? When I'm living a good life. Risking for something is stupid when you already have something stable right? I don't think that way now. Yet, I am afraid in taking such a big leap and falling flat on my face. When you take the risk it is not only a feeling but it is a way for giving your soul a certain degree of freedom. Until now, I don't know if I'll lay everything on the line for a maybe foolish dream but until I gain enough courage and until I'm not certain if I will remain in my situation. I await for a miracle to come. If it never comes maybe I'll keep on living only half of my life. If it will not come in this lifetime,maybe I'll just wait in the next life to come. My soul then awaits for it to be complete and for it to experience freedom.....

23.7.06

Of Soulmates and friends

How do you know? An ageless question which has been haunting us girls... We don't know who's meant for us.. A teacher once said that you'll know and you'll feel it. You can't let him out of sight. As for friends. We need to cherish them and have fun every time we have the time. You know that change is not the only constant thing in this world. Love is one constant phenomena we all experience.

17.6.06

An Ordinary Day

Just like any ordinary day, I woke up late, did my daily routines, and here I am saying goodbye to another day. It feels like nothing ever happens to my life. 


Nothing exciting or weird. Just another day. Sometimes it feels like I must not be special. I feel like I have no contribution to this world. I feel so low and so useless. Everyday I go to school and try to earn good grades but I'm not yet contented. I feel as if a dark abyss is in me that I feel so incomplete. 


Some may say that I should not feel this way because I have family and friends and that I should be more than thankful to have the best in this world, to have a good life but should I really be thankful? Everyday I live a safe life I grew up not taking risks, trying to please others and sometimes even sacrificing what I want and love for them.


 I feel like a robot everyday doing routines again and again. I'm tired of this type of life. I want to be free of the limits that society has placed upon me. In a way I'm a prisoner of myself. 


Dictating to myself what I should feel rather than doing what I want. Great philosophers were right when they said that there should be balance between care for others and for self and that I should also care for the world but how can I do such thing? How can I solve this dilemma? I may belong to the world but of what importance am I to others? 


Yes I may have friends but they can't always be there for you like what most cliches about friendships are. In the end the only friend you've got is yourself. Some say you need someone a person to love you to make you happy but I have a lot of persons in my life but none of them makes me fully happy. Maybe it is in faith that I have to find happiness or maybe I need to love a special person to be happy. I really don't know but as long as I haven't found the answers yet, everyday will just be like any ordinary day to me.

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